Each of us has dreams. Some might want to be scientists, information technologists, engineers, architects, dancers, musicians, and many other dreams that make life worth living.
Normally, we pursue an education that will lead to the fulfilment of our life’s goals. For me, I wanted to be a writer so I took Bachelors of Science in Development Communication.
Choosing a college degree is one of the biggest and difficult decisions we have to make.
“Choose a degree that you are genuinely interested in, one that will keep you reading not because it is required but because you want to know how it works, one that will challenge you just enough to push yourself past your limits, one that will keep you out of your comfort zone,” life coach Imma Montilla says.
But, in making such decisions, it is nearly impossible for parents not to weigh in. With good intentions, they want to have an input to help us in deciding which degree to choose. But sometimes, they are the ones who decide for us, thinking it’s the “right” or “best” choice for us.
Sometimes, they tend to choose a degree that is traditional, practical, and affordable, that could easier offer job security, financial stability, and a “brighter future” here at home and abroad. There are also parents who want their children to pursue their unfulfilled dreams. In these cases, they are likely to encourage their children to choose a degree that they have always wanted to pursue, but was not given enough opportunities to do so.
It’s a good thing if we and our parents want the same path. But, what if our parents have different things in mind from us?
Coach Imma says we should tell our truth and speak to our parents about our dreams in life, “Communicate your desire without expecting anyone’s mind to change. Have peace with your choice. At the end of the day, it is not about the degree you are pursuing, but the amount of heart you put into your studies.”
But Coach Imma also believes that the purest intentions we will encounter in life is none other than from our parents.
Another life coach, Jackie Chua also shares the same view. For her, it is important to understand and respect our parents.
“Listen to their side. Ultimately, they would want something for you that will allow you to have better opportunities in the future out of their love and care for you,” Jackie says.
“After hearing their side, also do intensive research and plan on what you really want to do in the future, and ready to be wholeheartedly committed to your own dreams and goals,” she adds.
According to Coach Jackie, there are many ways to discover what we really want in life and which paths should we choose.
She believes we should learn to let go of our need to meet our parents’ timeline and expectations for us, and the need to compare ourselves to other people’s timeline. Each has his/her own pace. We are not late; we are not early. We are on time.
“Try different things that will give you passion and joy. Do volunteer work or summer jobs that will let you discover what you love to do,” she suggests.
Coach Jackie also reminds us that it won’t be the end of the world, even if we choose a degree we do not want.
Coach Jackie explains that there are professionals who have had discovered their passion is different from what they initially studied. From there, they put their hearts to achieving their own dreams and have become successful.
Meanwhile, Coach Imma points out that we should not treat our degree as our only ticket to our life’s purpose, “Yes, it will help get you to where you want to be, but do not be confined to what society says you should be because of your degree.”
Written by: Jil Danielle Caro